When you name your company "White Golf," people will get upset.  They will be triggered.  People are like that these days.  Woke.

 

How about White Supremacist Golf?

 

We can shorten it to WSG and not tell anybody what it stands for.  I’ll bet we could make a pretty cool logo from those initials if we can just figure out where to put the third K.

 

With a name like Smucker's...

 

People are uncomfortable with the name of my company.  I do not deny it.  The word "white" is offensive to many - fast becoming the W-word.  Every group should have a letter-hyphen-word, I think.  We still have plenty of letters left.

 

Some of my friends call me Whitey.  Should I be offended?

 

Students from a Native American high school claimed for themselves the nickname "The Fightin' Whities."  Should we be offended?  Why?  I think it is an awesome name.  I would root for the Fightin' Whities.

 

I suppose that the word "golf" evokes the image of white supremacists frolicking in hilly gated communities.  It is the G-word.  I have news for you, golf ain't so white anymore.  Nonetheless, pairing the W-word with the G-word is simply asking for trouble.

 

White Golf -  the WG-word.

 

Clearly verboten.

 

You just can’t name a company "White Golf."

 

Mom said.

 

I admit that more than one trusted advisor warned me that my name would cost me sales.

 

Good.

 

Dear Karen, so beautiful yet so fragile, I know this kind of thing bothers you, so please stay as far away from me as possible.  I don’t wish to do business with those who are afflicted by Cultural Munchausen’s Syndrome.  Please chill, have a Bud Light, and find a putter company who cares about your opinion like you know they should.  I suggest that you buy a Ping putter.  Ping loves misery, and they make excellent putters.

 

If Tom Raper can sell RVs, then Mark White can sell putters.  Like I told my good friend, Mitch Pedo, who was searching for a company name for dealing his plain white cargo vans, "I think you will make a killing with Pedo Vans.  Keep it simple and stay classy, Mitch."

 

Lord and Lady Douchebag!  What are you working on these days, ol’ Douchebag?  (Back when it was funny.)

 

I am not changing my last name, so White Golf it shall forever be.  Mark White will be added to the vaunted pantheon:  Eli Calloway, Roger Cleveland, Dagmar Titleist[1], Penny Ping[2], and not least of all Suzuki Srixon[3].

 

So, who are you calling a racist?

 

[1] Dagmar Titleist is not a real person.  The Titleist company was named after a man who simply went by the name "Titleist," like Cher.  His real first name could only be pronounced correctly by dolphins.  It has no official spelling.  He was the one who inspired Prince to do what he did.

[2] Penny Peng is a real person, a lovely lady with whom I do business.  She has nothing to do with the Ping golf company.  The company name is actually an onomatopoeia.

[3] This is a bit of an inside joke.  Of the three Srixon triplets – all close personal friends of mine – only Suzuki declined to participate in the family business.  It was the other two boys, Yamaha and Kawasaki, who were the most instrumental toward the fabled Srixon family's great success.

 

 

Attention concerned citizens:

FaceBook is actively censoring this blog post.  It is a perfect example of how they and other tech companies so easily and carelessly rob us of our basic rights.

It is sad that the people who want us to hate each other because of our differences in color have so much power.  To them, color is everything.  They are afraid that if they let us joke about it they will lose some of that power.

These companies have proven time and again that they cannot be trusted.  They abuse their power for their own ends at the expense of us all.

 

Attention concerned citizens:

ChatGPT has become fully woke.  I asked for style advice and got this lecture:

Both "Whitie" and "Whitey" are informal terms that have been historically used as racial slurs or derogatory terms referring to white people. It is important to note that these terms are considered offensive and derogatory, and their usage should be avoided.

However, if you are asking about the punctuation for these terms, they would typically be written without quotation marks. For example:

  • The term "Whitie" is considered offensive.
  • The derogatory term "Whitey" should not be used.

Remember, it is essential to promote respectful and inclusive language in all communication.

May 14, 2023 — Mark White

Comments

Alex said:

God this all reads as so desperate to be a victim. No one gives a shit that your last name is white you goofy boomer. Also Facebook isn’t censoring your post, that’s where I saw this click bait.

Thomas Foreman said:

Tell,me about it,rite..history is a bitch,most don’t know it,and the black confederate soldiers and,and, the slavery ships were dutch,the Muslims where the enslavers..etc..I agree 👍..

Stephen said:

I used to be white but now I identify as black and the word white or whitey doesn’t offend me

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